Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
