Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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