doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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