it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
just tell him i said nine months
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
How's work?
Spinning.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
