did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
