can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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