And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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