FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
