I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize