no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
