HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize