Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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