I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
