When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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