38 yer olds are good kisserssss
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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