I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize
