You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
she pinky promised me she was 18
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Randomize
