Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize