She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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