Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize
