Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
