i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Randomize
