Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
