he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
