Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
