So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
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