paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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