How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
