just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
