you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I love having hate sex.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
