If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
How external is "for external use only"?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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