Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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