her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
