that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
