Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
