is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
