I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
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