A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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