I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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