The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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