Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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