His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
