New invention idea: vibrating tampons
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I'm both gender and math confused
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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