OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Just puked most of my soul out..
im on a boat
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