I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
