I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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