it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
