Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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