he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize