we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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