she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
