Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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